Saturday, October 31, 2009

Happy Halloween!

I love Halloween.


Not so much for the candy or headache of having to come up with costumes for the boys (I'll post those later--I can't post tonight after trick or treating--it's laundry night!).


I love it because it's the "gateway holiday."


When you're a Bez, you party at the end of the year!

On tap in the next two months we have:

Chunky's Birthday
Moochie's Birthday
Our Anniversary
New Year's


Happy Halloween!!!

Thus ends Blogtober or whatever it was called--I did it! 31 posts! Woot! And holy cow! Today is the FOUR year anniversary of my blog! Yikes that's a lot of yapping!


Friday, October 30, 2009


Only one more day left to blog!

As the weather has gotten colder (although it's supposed to be 72 degrees tomorrow. Bah!) I've been wearing more handknit socks.

I just finished reading Donna Lee's husband's guest post on her blog and it got me thinking about socks and what has stood up to the test of time and my atrocious laundry habits*.

My socks are also like little snapshots of my life.

Hold on for a longass post about footwear!

Sockotta Socks
Plain Jane Sockotta socks.

I made these during my lunch hours in Texass where I had no real lunchroom to knit it and my car was parked in the Nomansland parking lot (I had to take a shuttle to campus from that lot). I remember sitting on a bench next to the building I worked at and dropping my sock to let it unwind a bit on the needles (you know how your yarn can sometimes get twisted on itself?) and a hugeass Texass sized spider came down on his web to see what was up.

I never ate lunch there again.

Swedish Clown Cotton Sox

Broken Rib Swedish Clown Yarn socks.

I also knit these in Texass. Sort of. I knit them with some yarn I bought at Threadbear when I went to meet up with some wonderful Michigan knitters (Carina!).

These were the socks I brought to knit with me on my Texass job interviews. I also became a three needle bind off convert with these socks when I went to finish one of them in my hotel room in Texass--but realized I had not packed my yarn needle.

They're 3 needle bound off on the outside--I later learned to turn the socks inside out and bind them off.


Opal Yarn Auntie Jaywalker Socks.

Again, Texass knit socks (wow, I sure knit a lot of socks in seven months where I could hardly wear wool socks!).

I took these with me to visit my Aunt who was in Dallas at a trade show for work. We spent the night w/her in her hotel room and while we watched "The Devil Wears Prada" on the in-room movie channel, I whipped these out.

She was so curious about them (she's a crocheter who I believe might dabble in knitting) that I gave them to her when I finished them up a month or so later. It also helped that she bought a pair of cowboy boots on this trip--so I knew exactly what her shoe size was without having to ask!

First Socks

My first socks with some unknown ebay sock yarn.

Ugh. These were awful. Simply awful. Poor heel gussets, and just funky all over. You can see where I effed up the toe decreases on the top sock.

I gave one sock to Chunky one year to use as a dry erase a few years back and the other one I'll sometimes use as a ghetto camera case.


Chunky's Tiger Opal Rainforest Socks.

The only socks I knit in 2008!!!

He loved these things and wanted to wear them even though it was July and 90 degrees out when I finished them. I don't think they fit him anymore, but when they resurface in his drawer, he'll shove his feet into them anyway. Never mind that the heel is now at his arch.


German Flag Regia Socks.

LOVE this yarn! Regia rocks. It has withstood my brutal laundry habits and is not pilly or felted at all.

I knit these to commemorate my brother and sister in law's wedding. SIL is from Germany and the wedding took place there. I had had plans to go with Chunky, but my boss wouldn't give me the time off. I don't miss that woman at all.

I also knit my mom a pair out of the same yarn--but in a lace rib pattern. Mom luckily got to attend the wedding.


Unknown 100% wool spiral socks.

Sherry Surprise Santa-ed me this yarn and it was the first (and only) time I knit socks using 100% wool (with no nylon). It was also the first time I knit socks on needles smaller than a size US 2. It made for a really tight and sturdy fabric.

However the back of the heels now have holes in them from where they must have rubbed on my shoes and they've been waiting a few years to be darned.



Yukon Leaves in some Knitpicks sock yarn that I can't remember the color name of.

These were the first socks I knit in New Jersey.

One I knit in the hotel room that we lived in for the first week we were here before we found our apartment.

The second one I knit while doing laundry on Saturdays. One day a weird laundromat guy struck up a conversation with me about them, and since that day I have never stayed in the laundromat while my laundry has been washing. I sit out in my car knitting and/or reading/listening to podcasts while my laundry washes.

Koigu Potomamamamamus Socks.

Ok, so I didn't knit these. Karen did. She gifted them to me as a "welcome to New Jersey/damn close to New York" gift. I love them so and don't wear them too often as not to hurt them since they're Koigu and Potomamamamamamamus--a pattern that makes my brain hurt. They're only worn for special occasions!

Quill Lace Sockotta socks.

Another NJ set of socks. I knit these while I was looking for a job and was pretending to be a stay at home mom. I'd sit on the front porch in the afternoon while Chunky played in the front "yard" in April and we'd watch the school kids come home from school go past our house.

Now Chunky goes to that school and I'm still wearing these socks--right now actually.

Falling Out of Love Socks in STR "Mustang Sally."

I believe these were my first socks out of Socks that Rock. I finally got to understand what the hype was about.

STR yarn is superwash. But sadly it's not Bezzie Superwash. They later became my infamous sock planters.



Der Frawd Socks in STR Some Color I Can't Remember.

These were my first real attempt at toe-up socks---knit backwards that is. I'm not a big toe-up fan. I find the toe fiddly and annoying and have never had problems knitting cuff down. (Why fix what's not broken?)

But I loved Turtlegirl's Red Dwarf sock pattern.

So I knit them cuff down--backwards--Der Frawd.

Jaywalkers in Colorado State U colors by Pink Sheep (no longer selling her yarn I believe).

Finally, the last pair of adult sized socks I knit--back in 2007. I guess I the sock knitting really peaked for me in 2006.

I haven't worn these in a while because um, yeah, if you follow Colorado State football you'll know why. Sigh.

I do have a pair of socks on the needles in my car. If I get those finished before December 31, 2009 I'll be shocked. Otherwise 2009 will be my first sock-less year in three years!

Wait! I lied! Can't forget the Noro I Dream of Africa socks that I finished in February this year!


Nice yarn--and it does soften with washing. Just a little too much. It's starting to felt even though I actually DO handwash these socks despite their "superwash" label.

*Toss socks in laundry; wash in hot water (I used to do cold until I read it was possible to catch disease from laundromat washers--not sure if that's true, but I'm not taking any chances); tumble dry hot.


Thursday, October 29, 2009

15 Minute Post

That's all the time I have before The Office comes on.

My Chunky and Me time.

I don't have anything really interesting to blog about.

I can whine!

Dr. Mad Scientist found out from The Power That Is on Tuesday that they've changed their minds and WILL NOT let the students in The Program he's in get their alternate certification that would allow them to student teach and get paid at the same time starting January.

This really fucking sucks. I was hoping he'd start drawing a paycheck in January/February. Now we have to wait til September 2010.

So more loans we take out to pay for daycare. That's the only expense putting us in the red even with my penny pinching.

$1230 a month in daycare/aftercare for the boys. Fuck birth control.

You wanna not have babies? I'll let you come over and write that $250 a week check to the daycare place every month for Mr. Mooch.


But they're cute so I'll keep them and I'll keep the bitching to a minimum.

It doesn't bother me so much that they won't let Dr. Mad Scientist do this--what bugs me is that they led us on and then pulled the rug out from under us. I mean I could have planned better if I had known I'd have to tack another nine months of living on secretary wages.

That's my one gripe with The Program. The Power That Is seems to make up the rules as they go along. Must be nice.

If we can make it til June we'll be golden. By then Dr. Mad Scientist can stay home and watch the boys for the summer and we'll be OK.

So I guess in actuality, it's only another six months we have to grab our ankles.

This whole experience has really given me an appreciation of single mothers and fathers married to stay at home moms.

I mean don't get me wrong, stay at home moms are invaluable and I could never do it. They get a lot of press about how hard it is to be them.

But let's jump into Daddy and Single Mom's shoes--it fucking sucks to be stuck in a dead end job with the weight of supporting you family on your own on your shoulders. Yeah you can get another job--but that's a lot easier said than done in terms of economic climates and health care insurance coverage.

Big props to the Breadwinner Daddy and Single Mom's shoes.

Ha ha! What does that say about my lazy ass? No way I could Stay at Home it, and I struggle to get my ass out of bed to bring home the bacon every day.

Never happy!

But hey! At least we're better off than the starving kitties in Iraq.


They've got it a lot worse!

(One minute til 9:00!)

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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

My Schnit Doesn't Stink!

Working at some law firms you will find that, to use the tired saying "looks are everything."

When the firm moved to Newark a little over a year ago, before we moved Partner B kept describing the new office to us as "a real Class A space."

Apparently "Class A" extends to the bathrooms.

Now, I love our new bathrooms. They still have the stupid code lock on the doors--but this time it's not to prevent random suburban rapists who might be hiding behind the toilet paper dispenser--it's to prevent workers who don't work for our firm on other floors coming upstairs to use our bathrooms.

They're kind of a depressing overall color of gray and they're kind of poorly lit (but maybe it's just the gray sucking the light out of the bathroom) but they're wider than the old office's bathroom.

The old office had non-ADA compliant bathrooms that were narrow and hard to navigate.

Anyway, on Tuesday I walked into the bathroom and saw one of these on the counter:


It's a teeny little trashcan that's about a foot tall and about 8" across. It was placed over one of the holes in the counter that is a trash hole. (You know what I mean? Built in trash cans into the counter...)

The first thing that popped into my mind was that it was a receptacle for used feminine hygiene products (because for some reason when they build the new bathroom--they didn't put the little wall-trash cans on the side of each stall--you have to carry your bizniz out of the stall and throw it away with the used paper towels.

Curiosity got the best of me and I opened it to find a lone can of Lysol in there.

I got to talking with the Office Services lady (who is kind of like the everything-lady in the office, office supplies, coffee setups for meetings, etc.) and she was apparently told by Partner A to order something to hide the can of Lysol that is there for people to squirt after they drop a dookie.

Now explain to me how people are supposed to know that there's Lysol in a trashcan on the counter--covering a trash can no less?

Not to mention the thing looks stupid sitting on the counter like that. (As do the fingertowel holders that are sitting on the counter sitting right next to--you got it--the built in towel dispenser).

So I took it upon myself to whip up a little something for the Office Services lady.

Pardon the blurriness.


That's right.

It's a Lysol Cozy.


Since it's a prototype it's actually a miniature version that fits a travel size can of Lysol.*

I even went so far as to knit it in the firm's official depressing colors--gray and dark blue.

You'll note that they're actually scraps from Chunky's weird necked zipper sweater I knit him recently.

Office Services lady loved it and wants a big one for Christmas!

I don't know about that! Maybe if she buys pine-fresh Lysol.

*No I didn't waste money on a travel size can of Lysol--it came as part of the baby swag they send you home with from the hospital.

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Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Chug Chug Chugging Along

Last night I grafted The Pink Monster.


It turned out half-way decent. It's been forever since I kitchenered anything together (I prefer a 3-needle bind off for socks) and it didn't turn out half bad.

I was hoping to make some progress on this tonight, but I might shelf it for a little inside-joke knitting for a coworker.

If I can pull it off, I'll post that tomorrow!


Monday, October 26, 2009

When Hell Freezes Over


Maybe kids who live in climates where it gets cold but doesn't snow use these. I certainly hope it's just that niche climatic market this product is aimed towards.

Because if my boys ever expressed a desire for an inflatable snow fort...


I would have to disown them!!

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Sunday, October 25, 2009

And Then There Were None

Dr. Mad Scientist came home at 5:00 p.m. last night from AAapalooza to report they ate ALL the cookies.


I love the packaging on the marshmallow fluff jars. It appears they haven't changed their packaging since 1950.

Normally on Sundays I bake cookies. Not this Sunday. I'm cookied out.


Saturday, October 24, 2009

Cookie Crumbs

Man, I'm beat.

Ha ha!

Thursday I made one batch of cookies--oatmeal cherry.

The only ones I didn't get a picture of. They were OK. They'd be good with a cup of coffee or tea if you drank coffee or tea. I don't.

There's nothing fancy about the recipe. Just replace snipped up dried tart cherries for raisins in an oatmeal cookie recipe.

I should have made two batches on Thursday, but I didn't.

So that meant Friday night was jam packed with cookie baking.

I made chocolate chip toffee cookies.

(Take any chocolate chip cookie recipe and only use 1/2 of the chocolate chips suggested and substitute a 1/2 bag of toffee chips instead.)

Then it was Harvest Pumpkin cookies.


I swear I've posted about these before but I can't find the post.

And finally mini moon pies.


They were more like the size of oreo cakesters.

I'm pooped. I didn't get to bed til 1:30 a.m. last night.

Hopefully the AApaloozers will dig them!


Friday, October 23, 2009


I really SHOULD be baking cookies. I only got one batch instead of two baked last night. And it's 8:00 and I haven't started the three batches for tonight yet. Sigh.

But since I'm so close to finishing Blogtober or whatever it's called (this month has flown by!) I can't NOT post!

So I will give you another teaser picture.


Pardon the lint on my pants there--but these are part of the Pink Monster project I'm working on. They came in the mail today.

I hope to have Pink Monster done by the end of the month. It's at a boring stage right now--but I'm very close to finishing!


Thursday, October 22, 2009

Lifetouch Sucks

Oh yes. I said it. And I said it loud and clear on my highly google-able blog title there.

Gather 'round fellow consumers, some of which I know have school-aged children of who may have Lifetouch take their school pictures.

Approximately 4 weeks ago I ordered this:


That would be Package F consisting of 2-3x5s; 2-2x3s; 4-1.5x2.5s; and a class portrait. This was for $17.

I tacked on EXTRA F. Which was one 8x10 portrait. This was for $10.

My total was $27.

Lifetouch cashed my check on October 1.

Today Chunky brought home his pictures.


Notice anything missing? Like a $10 8x10 portrait?

The only reason I ordered a "package" is so I could get the extra 8x10. The next package that offered an 8x10 cost $31.


I love my kid, but who the hell needs 22 pictures in various sizes of their child? Especially in this digital age.

Maybe some of you do. But I don't.

I wanted an 8x10 to hang on the wall in my living room that's molding from the water leaking in from the ceiling hole.

I need one wallet size to put on the wall of my half cubicle to remind me why I'm even bothering staying at that shithole. And that's it. I don't even give Dr. Mad Scientist a wallet size. When people ask to see pictures of our kids--we send them to our family blog address.

So in a full on bitch-fit I claw through the assorted paperwork to see if there's a number I can call.

Nestled between sheet upon sheet of documents informing me of how I can reorder pictures of my kid in even more sizes and packages and in nifty little keepsakes like a toilet paper cozy with your kid's smiling mug on it..I find a phone number for the local Lifetouch office.

I call and find out from their message that they're open from 8:30 to 4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday.


Did you read my post a little ways back where I spoke about how we're stretched really thin at work? I came in early today, my desk is dusting in breadcrumbs from all the peanutbutter sandwich lunches I've been eating at my desk while working, and Mondays and Tuesdays (the days that Dr. Mad Scientist can't pick up the kids) are the only two days I can actually leave at 5:00 p.m. anymore.

When the hell am I supposed to call this stupid company when I'm at work?

I go online to find their national number.

I call it.

And I'm on hold for FIFTEEN MINUTES. I'm about to hang up because at this point Moochie is screaming his head off and Chunky is no longer able to entertain him.

But then--a real human gets on the other line.

As I shout to her the explanation of what happened over the Moochie screams (he was tired and there's no consoling a Mooch that's exhausted) she promises to mail out the 8x10 portrait.

She gets all my information and gives me my job number and confirmation number and informs me that I should have my picture in three to five weeks. FIVE WEEKS?

WHAT THE HELL? Five weeks? That's nearly Christmas. Chunky won't even LOOK like the kid in the photo by then!

What I really wanted to do was rip this woman a new one. But I couldn't because:

a.) it's not her fault that the picture order was screwed up. She's just dealing with pissed off parents because her coworkers can't do their jobs; and

b.) Moochie was SCREAMING.

Oh and the one time I did get him to hush while I was on the phone--the damn towel rack fell off of the wall in the bathroom. No. There are no towels on it. Yes, the screws anchoring the towel rack are 2" long. Little Miss Customer Service even heard it fall. Nice.

Ok, while they did make good on their mistake I'm still giving them a shitlist spot because they have my money and I don't get what I paid for for two months. Not to mention I got to be on hold for 15 minutes when I had many other things I could have been doing.

I'm on the shortend of this stick.

This whole Lifetouch debacle was the dingleberry on top of the shit sundae that was my day.

I should have just learned and done the pictures myself. I did it one year when Chunky took this really AWFUL picture and they didn't offer retakes (I don't think that was Lifetouch). I wasn't about to shell out money for those pictures. Ugh. He "smiled" like had swallowed a lemon.

To Chunky's credit--his smile was wonderful in these pictures. Not quite a smirk, not quite a grin. I love it!

Now I'm off to take a survey they ask you to take on the back of the envelope they don't put all your pictures in.

Ooo! I can get a JCPenney Portraits gift coupon if I complete the survey.

But guess what? JCPenney Portraits--you're on my shitlist too for being affiliated with this inept company!!!

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Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Nuthin' to Say

So I'll just show you pictures of my Hardy Moms.


Hardy mums seem to be "disposable" flowers around here.

I see them appear on pots on doorsteps and pathways every fall--but never before or after they bloom.

My yellow Mom from last year didn't make it through the winter. Maybe all those disappearing Hardy Moms I see are duds.


I'll be transplanting my Hardy Mom into a bigger pot after it finishes blooming and I'll bring it up to the top of the stairs for the winter last last year. She did pretty good out in the cold all winter.

Hardy indeed!


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Buttmonkeys Unite!

I try not to bitch about work on here. Really I do. For the most part I do enjoy my job and it's not so bad, and I'm thankful I have one...and blah, blah blah.

But this happens every fall for some reason. I reach my threshhold of bullshit and nearly break. Maybe it's the holiday cheer of November and December that keep me sane into a fresh new year...but it's getting tiresome.

I'd like to say it's just the bosses. But it's not. It's the slacker coworkers that can't handle more than one thing on their plate that I have to help out because I know how to chew gum and walk at the same time.

The latest word in the henhouse (brought to me directly from the beak of the most bitter of the Hens) is that they're not giving holiday bonuses and there will be no raises next January.

Ok. That's cool. I get it. I'm OK with that.

I've never taken bonuses and/or raises as 100% sure things.

But if what the Hens are saying is true--and they're hiring more attorneys--I'm going to be a little miffed.

We're already stretched so tight.

I'm kicking around an old idea from over ten years ago.

Untitled-1 1.psd

I'm thinking maybe the Hens and I should unionize under the Frazzled Employees Coalition of Administrative Laborers* Local 666.

Otherwise known as F.E.C.A.L. Local 666.

Now I just need to come up with a catchy union slogan--any ideas?

*My Old Man and I actually thought up this union name when I was working for Uncle Sam many, many years ago--back then it was the Federal Employees Coalition of Administrative Laborers. I'd carpool with the Old Man to the military base during the summer where I was a student hire for the Department of Defense. The Old Man retired from sucking on Uncle Sam's teat about four years ago.

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Monday, October 19, 2009


Whenever I think I had a mediocre weekend--all I have to do is go to work on a Monday and I remember how glorious my weekend really was.

This week's personal Cookie of the Week is a comfort cookie.


Peanut butter chocolate chip. Just take your favorite chocolate chip recipe and add 2/3 cup of peanut butter.

If you're astute you'll notice I qualified these cookies as "personal" cookies.

That is because Dr. Mad Scientist volunteered me to bake 5 to 8 dozen cookies for his AA chapter's big AApalooza. That's on Saturday. I've got four types of cookies I'll be baking for the event.

You'll remember last year post-Moochie-partum I baked about 8 different types of cookies for his New Year's Eve Massive Meeting. In some ways that was easier--I wasn't working. I only had to deal with one infant!!

Stay tuned, I'll definitely be blogging about the AApalooza cookie spread!


Sunday, October 18, 2009

Mark of the Beast

We did all our running around yesterday so we wouldn't have to today.

It was rainy, windy and cold. Perfect for staying inside.

I decided I would spend the day with my sewing machine, The Beast.

I have been on the lookout for a new lunchbag pattern for a while. While surfing the CRAFT magazine blog this week, I found my way to a link for the Poochie Bag. While I'm not so fond of the colors she used to make up all of hers, I liked the small tote-ish nature of the bag and was sold on the front pockets. I like to carry my bills in my lunch bag (so I don't forget to mail them*).


Great easy to do pattern.

Not fun to make when you've got a shitty sewing machine. I broke three needles on this bag and for some reason when I am running down to the end of the bobbin thread or the top thread, the tension gets all effed up and the stupid thing decides to throw a hissy fit.

Chunky is entering a safety poster drawing contest at school with a prize of $1000. He assures me that if he wins, after he buys himself every set of Legos he doesn't have, he will buy me a new machine. Awww!


Despite the plethora of profanity and hair I ripped out wrestling with The Beast to make this, it turned out pretty good.

I can't wait to use it for lunch tomorrow!

*No, I don't e-pay my bills. I will spend the 44 cents to send the dickwads at the power company my check. Why should they get their "estimated" money any faster?

Saturday, October 17, 2009


We woke up early and traipsed into the pediatrician's office to get Mr. Mooch his second flu shot.

Chunky was supposed to get one too--but oh darn, they didn't have any big kid doses in yet.

Honestly, if it wasn't mandatory for NJ daycare kids to have them, Mr. Mooch would be flu shot free.

I'm supposed to call next week to schedule Chunky to get his and to schedule Mr. Mooch's 12 mo. check up in December (12 MONTHS? WHEN THE HELL DID HE GET SO BIG?).

I don't think I'm going to mention the whole Chunky flu shot or Swine Flu shot like the ped was making rumblings about. I drank the flu shot koolaid one year and I got the flu so bad. I nearly ended up weaning Chunky as a result of being so dehydrated and steamrolled by the virus. No thanks. Blah blah, I know that's not supposed to happen, but until they make a vaccine that covers ALL strains, I'll save the vaccinations for some elderly people who actually want it.

And not to say that every lab is like this...but after hearing the shit that went down in Dr. Mad Scientist's old labs--I'll pass on the whole Swine Flu shot. You know how when you work at McDonalds you learn what goes on behind the scenes and as a result you never eat at McDonalds again? Yeah.

Anyway--the weather is downright chilly here!

43 degrees outside right now.

The boys were going a bit stir crazy--and Mr. Mooch having his nap schedule screwed six ways to Sunday by the aforementioned flu shot appointment--I broke out the sleds to entertain them.


Can't wait til it snows and we can use these babies for real!



And why yes, that would be Chunky going shirtless inside the apartment with an ambient temperature of 58 degrees if you can trust the ancient thermostat. He said it was "too hot."

He's the offspring of two Alaskans and born in Michigan. Would you expect anything less? Ha ha!

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Friday, October 16, 2009


Thank god this week is over.

I swear if I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up I'd be doing that--instead of being Buttmonkey Secretary.

I'm finished being everybody's buttmonkey!!


Best thing Chunky brought home from school today: the Halloween UNICEF change-drive letter. It wins the "best thing" award for this quote: "We ask that you not send pennies, for they are very heavy to carry into the store." Wow. Oh, and can you make sure they're crisp $1 bills you send? The tattered ones are so fragile.

Remind me when Chunky's in 6th grade to volunteer to heft pennies and cut out this nonsense. Geeze.


A year ago this week the park across the street at work looked like this:


I haven't taken a recent picture, but it's more fall-y looking this year.

One year during fall in Michigan, I took a picture of this tree by the mailbox outside every week day for nearly a month when I took out the mail. I never developed the film. It was a disposable camera. I know that camera is around here somewhere. I should really get that developed.

The weekend weather is barely supposed to crack 50 degrees, no sun, and lots of rain.

Fine by me.


Knitting is going. I haven't been able to do as much as I like because my lunch knitting has been interrupted by being the aforementioned buttmonkey and not getting to go to lunch. My desk is covered in peanut butter sandwich crumbs.


Milestone alert. Someone will be turning 10 months this upcoming week and has learned to shove food in his mouth all by himself.


Thanks to Poops's Dave for the inspiration of a Ritz (ok, knock off storebrand) cracker. I don't know if I'm being uber-cautious mom and am afraid of him choking (Cheerios are a bit much), I can't remember when I fed Chunky "real" bits of food, or he doesn't have enough teeth yet for the sturdier foods...probably a combination of all of the above but it feels like he's behind where Chunky was at this age. Probably not. Seven years between kids will wipe out all your memories of the mundane little details like this.



Tomorrow we will go spend money we don't really have.

But it's for shoes for Dr. Mad Scientist.

He started his field work this week and is really digging it. Dr. Alphabetsoup is his "mentor" and from what he says they seem to be on pretty much the same wavelength. This is good. Some of his classmates have been paired up with teachers who have been teachers for a long while and are kind of set in their ways. I can't really pass judgment--who doesn't get like that when they work a job for X years?

Dr. Alphabetsoup is a good match for him. She has a PhD and used to be a researcher in Michigan. Hee hee. Doesn't get more matchy than that!

He needs some respectable shoes. His old ones are nearly three years old and not holding up well. Considering he used to put lots of Manhattan miles on them, they wore down faster than suburban shoes do.


Ok, I'm going to see if I can't pry this lap whore off my lap and get into my jammies for a night of lounging on the couch.


After a summer of being kicked off laps because it was too hot--I'm not the only one loving this cold weather!


Thursday, October 15, 2009

Pink Monster

The top secret project made from pink acrylic is about half-way done.


It's a commissioned piece of sorts.

I have to wait to finish the other half to get rid of those live stitches you see there.

If this turns out--it's going to be a riot.

It feels good to design something weird. I haven't done it in a while.


Wednesday, October 14, 2009


I don't know if its the phase of the moon or what but every little thing has me bitchy today.

I got worked up about a flyer from the Governor (it's an election year here in NJ) that was very vagino-centric. He had four topics in his little flyer.

The ones that he hit on that pissed me off the most was the "fact" that his opponent will take away our mammograms, he championed the NJ FMLA, and he won't let anyone kick us out of the hospital after squirting out a baby before 48 hours is up.

Never mind that I've read both he and his opponent have basically made up and keep poking each other about this crazy mammmogram thing; that MEN CAN TAKE FMLA LEAVE TOO; and holy shit, I would have cried for joy if the hospital had let me go home less than 48 hours after having Moochie.

I'm cranky about it because I'm not sure I like this guy 100% to get my vote. The Independent candidate, while kind of "yesmanish," has some decent answers that rival the incumbent's positions on key issues that matter to me.

But due to circumstances I won't (and can't) spell out too clearly here--I'm forced to vote for either my ideals or to feed my family.

I'm very tempted to vote with my grocery bill because I know by the time the Governor elected this November is finished with his term, we'll be hopefully looking to leave New Jersey. Sigh. Not the best reasoning, I know.

I'm still going to hold the "women's issues" propaganda against the Gov though until Dr. Mad Scientist gets a flyer from him in the mail addressing stereotypical manly topics. What exactly would those be?

There's pandering to special groups of voters, and then there's just piss poor pandering. Because as a woman all I care about is my tits and babies--obviously.

And speaking of boobs, if you've made it this far I will reward you with something I found humorous.


These are my Breast Cancer Mushrooms. They came in a pink tray and a sticker stating that the Mushroom Council donates to breast cancer research.

Now am I the only one that associates mushrooms with death and decay?

Eat mushrooms so you don't get breast cancer and end up as mushroom food!!

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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Showering On It

The leaves are getting more colorful.

The air is getting crisper.

And if you walk outside (especially in the morning) and listen really closely you can hear the collective whine of the nation about how cold it is and how we've skipped fall and gone straight to winter.

Last year we made it til the first weekend of December before we turned the heat on.

This year I know we won't make it that long.


Not because we're thin blooded and can't take the cold, it's because some of us are descendant from thin blooded people who can't take the cold.

You see this Thanksgiving we have family visiting (and no, that's not a blog euphemism for me being knocked up--been there, done that and have the Chunky Turkey Baby to prove it).

Grandma and Grandpa Mad Scientist, despite dealing with ginormous financial problems this year that I won't air here, in typical Mad Scientist genetic style (i.e. money burns a gaping hole in their pockets in an alarmingly fast fashion) bought tickets down to New Jersey with their PFDs before they even got them.

Anyway, after learning the hard way coming home one March day from a shrinky dink appointment a few years ago to find the babysitter all bundled up like she was traveling to the Arctic, we've learned that guests require heat.

Which brings me to this problem.


Plus this:

Plus this:

Equals a trip to the burn unit and a visit from DYFS.

I've googled "radiator covers" and basically I have three options:

1. Spend an ungodly amount of money for covers (we're talking at least $200+ per cover);

2. Make your own cover out of plywood and stuff;

3. Surf craigslist until you find someone selling a set that fits your radiators at a decent price; or

4. Shower on it and come up with something more creative.

Here's my problems with these options in the same order:

1. We rent this dump. There's a dinner plate sized hole in the living room ceiling that leaks every time it rains above a sprinkle that the landlord doesn't give a shit about fixing, the bathtub never drains no matter how many times you snake it, there's a light fixture in the "closet" off the living room (that also has a history of a leaky ceiling) that appears to be impossible to change the burned out light in, and the list goes on. I ain't sinking $200+ dollars into something that I'm not going to be able to use once we move. And asking the idiot landlord for help with this is out of the question--he can't even fix a leaky ceiling!!

2. I like this option. But I don't really have the power tools to be this old housing up a set of covers. ETA: I'm fully aware that a lot of your major box hardware stores will cut your plywood to your specs. Have you been to Home Despot on a weekend (the only time I could get this done)? Yeah, I don't want to spend all day there getting a piece of wood cut. It's almost as bad as shopping at Costco on a rainy Sunday where people feel the need to block the ginormous warehouse sized aisles with their carts while they wait in line for a cup of microwaved potato soup made from a powdered mix. Two bites of soup people. If you're really that hungry go to a REAL soup kitchen and get out of my way!

Woah. That was a little off track there.

3. I like this option as well. Except you have to basically take a gamble that the person writing the post in multiple misspellings knows how to operate a tape measure.

4. I'm about to go off and do this right now.

I might also ponder how to break him of the habit of caving to the siren's lure of the flashing modem lights.


The stale froot loop back there probably isn't helping.